Super Spiral Nemesis
by EvilDeathKitty
Summary: Amu was simply enjoying life, her school, and everything, when a sudden event caused everything to change. Now Ikuto and Tadase have to come to her aid as new revelations are shed on their lives and the world around them...
1. What It Means

Super Spiral Nemesis, Chapter 1

What It Means

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A/N: Umm... I had a lot of idas for stuff and stuff but then I realized that thay were kinda retarded so I made this~ It's a tribute to my bff who really liked this before but then she was like "Naw, I'm over it now. ALL HAIL MAID-SAMA." But then she game me this cool idea for this and I had inspiration, so thank you! Enjoy!

PS: Say apologies for me to the mangaka and the internet.

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It was another wonderful day at Amu's school. The birds chirped delightful little tunes atop beautifully blossoming trees, even though it was winter. Due to all of her clubbing activities, she met many cute girls in the club and boys too. As she approached the school gates, she met her crushes, Tadase and Ikuto. Tadase was very cute looking in Amu's opinion, but sometimes he looked like a girl. And Ikuto was super hot and sexy which Tadase was not, but sometime Amu felt deaf after hearing him because he spoke in ALLCAPS because he was super manly along with his hot and sexiness.

"Oh hey guys how's it going? (#^.^#)" Amu asked the two guys. "Doing all of our school and clubbing is really fun isn't it (^▽^)"

"Like, it's super cool!" Tadase said to her. "I'm totally psyched for whatever lessons we're getting next!"

"WHATEVER. I DON'T EVEN CARE ABOUT YOUR SCHOOL SINCE I DON'T GO THERE. BY THE WAY, IS IT ME OR SHOULD I PUT A SHIRT ON SINCE IT'S THE MIDDLE OF WINTER EVEN THOUGH THE TREES ARE BLOSSOMING BUT THEY DON'T MAKE FRUITS EVER?"

Amu giggled. "It's okay, Ikuto. I like you better shirtless and blue anyways. It matches your hair! (^_^)"

But then... SHE WAS KIDNAPPED!

A girly brunette fell from the ground and laughed vey big. "Ahahahaha! We are the gay desperados! We are going to spread harmony twice over, and then nuke the world with LOVE!"

A boyish brunette came. "Ohohohoho! You cannot stop our plan! Because we feel like showing off, we wanted to make this speech! You girlfriend will summon Satin to destroy the world, so the people will suffocate! Then they will fall in love with each other while singing, and then their pain and love will fuel Satin's power!"

"BUT HOW," Ikuto asked. "SATIN IS A FABRIC."

The girly brunette walked up to Ikuto very closely. "We know! Satin has a very powerful aphrodisiac! It will be made by the blood of 72 shojo manga heroines and 108 videogame pimps!"

"Videogame pimps? Like, that sounds really awkward. Are they like those guys who make girls do weird things for them?"

"Not exactly…" the boyish one said. "Girls, and sometimes even guys just happen to fall in love with these people, hence 'pimps'. For example, if you had a pierced ear and weren't a catboy, you would look a lot like a videogame pimp!"

"…" Ikuto said.

"Do you, like, wanna get kidnapped?" Tadase cried. "Well, you're totally not a videogame, so I guess you can't get kidnapped anyways."

"SHUT UP," Ikuto said to him.

"Dilly dally, shilly shally!" the girly brunette said, carrying Amu away on a casket.

Ikuto looked shocked. "IT'S MIDNIGHT ALREADY? OH NOES."

To be continued!


	2. They Don't Revocer The Amu But Maybe

Super Spiral Nemesis, Chapter 2

They Don't Revocer The Amu But Maybe

"Likem, this is so totally bad!" Tadase said crying. "Can you hold me?"

"YES I CAN, BUT I WON'T," Ikuto grumbled ina manly fashion. "WE HAVE TO SAVE AMU OR ELSE WE WILL BE SUFFOCATED BY SATIN."

"Well, yeah! I mean, she loves us and we love her, so we can't let her down! Let's do this for love and government!"

"I HATE THE GOVERNMENT."

"Okay, then screw that! What should we do now? I man, we don't know where Amu is going to end up, and- wait a minute, they're still on the road!"

"THEN FOLLOW ME," Ikuto said and grabbed a skateboar because skateboars are cool.

"Ha! You two really are idiots!" The boyish brunette and the chariot the pthers were on suddenly vanished, and Ikuto suddenly found himself in a freezing lake.

"Ikku! Are you okay?"

"OF COURSE I AM OKAY. MY MANLY BLOOD HELPS ME SURVIVE, WHICH IS COOL BECAUSE I CAN'T GET COLDS NOW. AND WHO GAVE YOU PERMISSION TO CALL ME IKKU?"

Tadase smiled. "But if you can't catch a cold, then that totally means you're an idiot! Ha, ha, Bakato!"

"YOU KNOW, I'LL LEAVE YOU IF YOU KEEP JOKING AROUND LIKE THAY." He sniffed the air, then fanned his nose in disgues. "I CAN'T SENSE AMU ANYWHERE NEARBY. MAYBE WE SHOULD SEARCH FOR CLUES."

"But how, Ikku? We like, have no leads, and you can't even track her dopwn!"

"WE'LL DO IT USING OUR NATURSL TALENTS. WE CANUSE OUT CHARAS TO MAKE US INTO IDOLS, SO THE ENTIRE WORLD WILL NOTICE US. UNFORTUNATELY, I AM A MANLY MAN, AND MANLY MEN DON'T MAKE GOOD IDOLS. WE WILL HAVE TO TO CROSSDRESS!"

"Like, don't sweat it," Tadase said playfully. "I'm not even a real guy anyways."

"what"

"I'm like, a total herm. I evem made a baby! She's so cute, I call her Momoko."

"CANNOT UNSEE." Ikuto ran away from Tadase because he now knew the truth. He thought to himself, "**So that's why he's so girly… That kinda explains why I fell sorta but not really gay for him.**"

"Waaaaaait!" Tadase cried enve more at the thought of IUkuto leaving. "We have to do this together!I mean, if you rescue Amu by yourself, then she will love you more! I slill love her too, you know!"

"FINE. LET US SAVE THE WORLD FRON SATIN'S AFRODESIAC!"

Tadase already changed intro a girl's uniform while Ikuto was ALLCAPSing. "Like, okay! So where do we start off?"

"WELL, WE HAVE TO GET AN AGENTS FIRST. ONCE WE GET AGENTS WE HAVE TO DO THIBS FOR THEM AND WE'LL GET POPULAR QUICK."

Tadase looked very happy because of the idea. "I know agents! They're, like, in this super cool building I saw. We can totally get there right now, so follow me this time!"

In a long time later, there was only war. But in in a short time later, they were at the building which was sorta sinister.

Tadase waled up to the reception lady and said, "Like, it's me, Hotori Tadase! I'm here to see 'The Gentleman's Cross Alliance.'" The air quotes made Ikuto really uncomfortable.

"WHAT DO THOS EAIR QUOTES MEAN?" Ikuto asked.

Tadase simply flolicked around to the elevator and entered a password. "There we go! Now we can enter the… Gentleman's Cross Alliance."

Ikuto dragged him away from the building. "BUT I DON'T THING THOS ARE AGENTS. THEY SOUND LIE MAFIA."

Tasase flicked his rist. "Pshaaaaw! They're totally legit! One of them even told me that after I payed them to hit Momoko. Then I was like super sugoi!11"

Ikuto didn't think he was lying, because he knew Tadase was an idiot. That's why neither of them catch colds.

"I HAVE A BETTER PLAN. WE MUST BECOME A VIDEOGAMES. THEN I SHALL TRAIN TO BECOME A GUN'SBRASTER SO I SHALL BE AN HERO."

"Like, you know people that can do that! sugoi!11!"

"OF COURSE. I HAVE A CHILDHOOD FRIEND WHO I HAVE NEVER MENTIONED UNTIL NOW BECAUSE SHE WAS SO SUEPER AWESOME AND PRETTY AND LOVELY TO COMPLIMENT MY SUPER HOT AND SEXY MANRINESS… NAKAGAWA SAKURA!"

And off the two gaus went because Tadse was being told all about Sakura's super awesomely pretty loveliness and wanted to meet went on their skateboars then saw a girl who was tending to a cherry tree in the middle of a river. Ikuto went to the edge of the river and yelled…..

"SAKURA YOU'RE DROWNING!"

at the top of lung.

The girl doggy-paddled towards Ikuto while covering her ears. "Ikku! I lovelovelovelove you and want to make babbys with you! I will help you with whatever you want!

"Like, I heard from ikku that you coukd find angents in here!" Tadase said like Tadase.

Sakura started to be mean at Tadase. "Omg I'm not going to tak to you you hermaphrodite! You suk and I hope you burn in hell cuz Ikku is MINEEEEEEEE!"

Tadase was not very happy by all this and began to tar inside. "You, like, seriously hurt my feelings…"

Sakura began to smile again once she spoke to Ikuto. "Now Ikuu, what was it that you wanted? I was busy taking to _people who should burn in __**hell**_."

Ikuto stared at Tadase who was huddled up in a coroner acting like a angsty spankmonkey.

"Like, what does he see in her? She's way less cuter than Amu, even if her hair is sparkly like ponies and her eyes change colour every 0.03 seconds."

For a moment, the hot and sexy guy felt a bit sympathetic even though he did not like him too much. "WE SHOULD GO GET TADASE TOO. I MEAN, HE COUD BE USEFUL IN GETTING US RELATIONSHIPS."

Sakura's body began to glow as her eyes stopped changing solour and were red. "No, Ikku. I want yooooooouuuuuu. The agents are right across the river, but I won't let you pass ever unless he goes to _**hell**_."

Ikku looked at the simple building at the other side of the river, although the cherry tree that drowned Sakura was kinda big and blocky.

"You're _mine_, and I want you to remember that. You love me more than anyone, don't you? I mean, we're childhood friends, and our looks totally compliment each other! Pleeeease say you do, and then we can have babbys together!"

When she said those last words, Tadase hit her on the head with a stock. "No, Sakura! You're not understand! Ikuto and I both love Amu, and there's nothing you can do to change that!" He chared towards the dazed girl, and punted her in the ace.

Tadase went into "oblivious" moe. "Now she's unconcious! I love it when ppl do that! It's super sugoi!1"

"JUST CROSS THE RIVER ALREADY," Ikuto said, tired of all of the things that they had to do. Ikuto and Tadase were getting closer to Amu, but Ikuto needed gun'sbrasting trainer or else they would be sent to hell before Satin could suffocate them.

Unbeenaunsed to them, Sakura fell from the tree as she floated dowm. Once she was on the ground, she sung a little titty.

"I'm your childhood friend, I'll follow you until you love me… Beacuse I am a tree! I'm not satisfied, until that herm is _fried_! I'll kill you myself if that is how you feel about me, center river cherry~"

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Last A/N for now: Did I done good? Have I gotten better! I'm not sure… TT_TT I will do my best! Or you can brast me with gun's too! And Sakura issuper cool, don't you think? I wanna be like her when i grow up!


	3. Mass Destruaction Is Immanent

Suer Spiral Nemesis, Chapter 3

Mass Destruaction is Immanent

an: like there wuz did british troll on my account and I think that there trying to do sumting bad to me and now sdjnsbhuydh dl UboaaaaaaaAAAあああああああああああああああああ

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_Hahaha! Hello there! Disregard that harlot as she licks testicles. I shall exact my revenge on the world soon, my friends, and then you shall bow down to ME! Just try to figure out my plan if you can._

_I leave the rest of this document to you, my unfortunate victim. SPREAD THE WORD!

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_

an cuntinood: OMGWTFOTL what wa that that wuz da brutish troll whos bin doing things now I hvto wite against my own will or stuff happerns!

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KIkuto was at an Agents becuz he needed to be popular to find the brunets and save Amu from bein sacrifized by Satin.

"Weeeeeelcome" an agents aid to them

"Hey ther! Hotori Tadase is here to say that we want to become stars!" He new it wud werk because Ikuto changed into girl clithes when they went through the river.

"Suuuuuuuuuure. Why issss that girl wering hotpants?"

Ikuto tried to mimic Tadase's mannerisms but the ALLCAPS made him too different. "LIKE I DUNNO, BY BFF TADASE I GUESS"

"Whateveeeeeeeeer," the agent sed boredyl and got them to the stage.

"Heeeeeeere is where you'l aaaaaaaaaaaaal be staying," she said to the two people who were not really irls sins Tadase was kinda a guy to.

"WHY ON THE STAGE," Ikuto said madly. "WE'RE ALL HUMEN BEINGS HERE!"

"Not on the staaaaaaaaaage, you twaaaaaat," the agent sed agen in a very loud voice, "The roooooooooooooom."

So they were going to went to the room where they found girls on the bed. The girl on top said to them "Hi!"

"WE HAVE NO TIME FOR THIS!" Ikuto yelled. "MAKE US STARS!"

And so they learnt how to be good dancers because they needed to dance and do things to the agents so they would like them more. Ikuto was very popular because they thought he was a trap but he was a catboy to so it was ok.

"Like, how about that?" Tadase said very happy this time. "So wherr do we have to go to now Ikku?"

"WE HAVE TO GO TO FINAL BOSS CHAMBER! THE LAND KNOWN AS HELL MINDSCAPE"

"Hell Mindscape? That, like, sounds way to dangerus! I don wanna dye like Amu wi—"

"DON'T SAY THAT! TIERS DON EXITS IF WE DONT CRY! AMU'S STILL ALIVE REMEMBER?"

Tadase was very yes at this and now had hop on his shoulders. They went to fing the Hell Mindaspe but then they were stoped!

"Iku. I want you now cuz we should be close!"

"OKAY SURE" Ikuto said because it was Sakura!

"No, don't take Ikuto way erom me!" Tadse yeled with all his might.

"No! I'm very angry at Ikku becuz he rejected me and now he has to pey the prise!" And she stabed him with all her strength from the ground. Ikuto was hurt and started to look sad.

Tadase orzed into sadness too. "IKKU! No! You have to pay badly!"

Sakura laughed. "Now hes mine! I don't ker about yu but I still want you ded! But I cant cuz Im a tree."

"HA!" Tadase laugfhed too and was still crying. "You, like, don't know what I can do!" He stood up and turned into whatever the hell he turned into but was not a prince maybe—ow!

He wasthen pointing at Sakura very dramatically. "I reject your ryality and subdtitut my on!" and Sakura did.

"THNKS TADASE!" Ikuto said very greatful.

"Like, no problem! And your alive agen!"

"NOW LETS GO AND SAVE AMU" and they both went very hurted.

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"You know, I totally love you," Tadase seid.

"I DON'T."


End file.
